How we can help you

People turn to mediation when there is a crisis and it is for the family mediator to help separating couples navigate that. The point of mediation is to find a resolution to conflict without having to go through the courts. In fact, the courts are so busy that there are long waiting lists and delays before a case can be heard. This is why the courts actively encourage mediation as an effective method to resolve issues surrounding divorce and separation. It is a form of what is known as Non-Court Dispute Resolution.

A mediator is not there to help you mend your relationship. Our job is to enable you to find the best way forward for you and your children by providing a safe space to discuss all the options.

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Aspects of Mediation
These are a few of the super-powers of the process that you will not benefit from in the court system

It is confidential

Whatever you say in mediation cannot be used in a court of law. No matter what you propose or what options you consider during the sessions, you will not be kept to it. You can change your mind as much as you like during the process.

Once you and your former partner decide on a set of proposals, only then will the mediator write them up into a Confidential Mediation Summary. You can then ask your solicitor to write up a consent order for the court to approve. That will then be legally binding in terms of the financial agreement that you have come to.

You decide

There is no judge in mediation. Your mediator is impartial and works to enable you and your ex-partner to have the most effective conversations possible. It is for you to decide what is best for your family. Only you understand all the nuances of the dynamics in your family so it is right that you should decide the next steps. Since it is you and your ex-partner who will be living by these decisions, it is fitting that you should be the ones making them. It also makes it more likely that you will want to adhere to them.

You can start now

Divorce and Separation often involves children and it is well-known that conflict has an adverse effect on them. So to be able to move towards a new normal without delay is one of the great benefits of mediation.

The concept of time is not the same for children. What might be a few months in a busy adult's life, could equate to a whole summer for a small child. Behaviours are learnt, relationships are sometimes put on hold.

Even finding an interim arrangement that works for the family while larger issues are considered can be extremely helpful.

It is voluntary

The courts are encouraging divorcing couples to try mediation before entering the legal arena as they cannot cope with the caseload.

Unlike the court process, the dates and frequency of sessions are decided by you. You can pause to gather additional information or professional advice and then continue with the next session. That is to say, you can halt the process whenever you choose, you can change mediators and start again or decide on another route.

If there is a serious reason that you feel unable to mediate, you will not be obliged to.

Other significant advantages of Mediation

1. For most people, the cost of going to court is ruinous. At a time when, as a couple you are dividing your assets to serve the needs of two households, it makes sense to try to keep as much of your money for your family. There is no set number of mediation sessions that you are required to have and the amount that a mediator will charge you for their services will vary.

However, it is safe to say that mediation is the cheaper option by far.

The payment structure is per person all through the process. Where there are additional specialist reports about issues such as capital gains tax or pensions, you can split the cost as appropriate.

2. Your children can be heard. As part of the process, a specially trained child-inclusive mediator can offer children from aged 10, a safe and confidential platform to let you know what they are thinking. This can be of great benefit to them at a most distressing and confusing time.

3. If the idea of discussing these issues in person is overwhelming, mediation can also take place over zoom and in cases of extremely high conflict there is "Shuttle Mediation".

This is when the mediator conducts the conversation by speaking to each partner separately and shuttles between the two, relaying what is being said.